Your Hormones Are Changing—Here’s How to Support Yourself Through Perimenopause

There’s a moment many of us don’t see coming. You’re in your early 40s, still juggling all the things—career, kids, aging parents, your sanity—and suddenly your sleep gets weird. You’re snapping at your partner over nothing. Your cycles are all over the place. You feel... off, but you can’t quite put your finger on it.

Sound familiar?

This in-between phase, this hormonal gray area, is called perimenopause. It’s not menopause yet—but it is a shift. A big one. And it deserves more than the vague advice we’re usually handed (“Cut back on caffeine!” “Try yoga!”). Women need real tools, grounded knowledge, and the kind of emotional support that actually meets us where we are.

My own awareness of perimenopause came gradually. I remember watching my mom go through it in her late 40s—hot flashes, brain fog, mood swings she didn’t see coming. She was strong and self-sufficient, but looking back, I realize how unsupported she felt. Her doctor called it “just a phase.” Her friends didn’t really talk about it. And she, like so many women, quietly pushed through.

We don’t have to do it that way. We can be informed. Proactive. Empowered.

What Is Perimenopause?

Perimenopause is the transitional phase before menopause. It’s when your ovaries begin to slow down estrogen and progesterone production. This can start as early as your mid-to-late 30s, though most women begin noticing changes in their 40s.

It’s not menopause until you’ve gone 12 consecutive months without a period. But the years leading up to that? That’s where things get interesting. Cycles can become irregular. PMS may feel intensified. Sleep, mood, and energy levels can feel unpredictable—even if your periods haven’t stopped.

So no, you’re not imagining it. These shifts are real. And they’re worth addressing with the respect and attention they deserve.

The Signs of Perimenopause No One Warned You About

Everyone expects hot flashes (though not all women get them). But perimenopause shows up in far subtler—and sneakier—ways.

Here are some signs that often fly under the radar:

• Sleep disturbances (especially 3 a.m. wakeups with racing thoughts)
• Worsening PMS or suddenly heavier/lighter periods
• Increased anxiety or irritability
• Brain fog or trouble concentrating
• Breast tenderness and bloating
• Low libido or vaginal dryness
• Changes in body composition (e.g., weight gain around the midsection)

What makes this even trickier? These symptoms can overlap with stress, thyroid issues, or burnout—so it’s easy to brush them off as “just life.” But tuning into patterns and tracking your cycle can help you start connecting the dots.

How to Actually Support Yourself—Body, Mind, and Lifestyle

1. Track Your Symptoms, Not Just Your Period

This was a game-changer for me. I started using a cycle tracking app—not just for bleeding days, but for energy shifts, sleep patterns, moods, cravings, and even digestion. After a few months, I noticed clear phases where I felt great and others where I felt emotionally and physically zapped.

Tracking helps you spot what’s hormonal versus what might be situational—and gives you actual data to bring to your healthcare provider.

2. Build a Nutritional Foundation That Supports Hormonal Shifts

What you eat can directly impact how your body processes estrogen and progesterone. During perimenopause, your blood sugar and insulin sensitivity may change, so prioritizing protein, fiber, and healthy fats becomes especially helpful.

A few supportive tweaks:

• Add flaxseeds or chia seeds to your breakfast—they may help support estrogen metabolism.
• Incorporate cruciferous vegetables (like broccoli and Brussels sprouts), which support your liver in processing excess hormones.
• Aim for consistent, balanced meals—skipping meals or crash dieting can make hormone symptoms worse.

And no, this isn’t about being perfect. It’s about nourishing your body so it has the tools to regulate itself as best it can.

According to Healthline, diets rich in fiber and phytoestrogens (plant-based estrogens, like those in soy) may help reduce some menopausal symptoms, including hot flashes and night sweats.

3. Support Your Sleep—Like It’s a Full-Time Job

When estrogen and progesterone dip, sleep quality often tanks. Progesterone, in particular, has a calming effect on the brain—and when it’s low, you may find yourself waking up in the middle of the night, unable to fall back asleep.

What’s worked for me:

• Cutting caffeine by 2 p.m. (hard at first, but worth it)
• A magnesium glycinate supplement (always check with your doctor)
• Keeping lights low after 8 p.m. to signal to my brain that it’s wind-down time
• Taking screen-free walks in the evening to lower cortisol

Sleep hygiene isn’t sexy, but it’s essential during this phase.

4. Rethink How You Exercise (More Isn’t Always Better)

High-intensity workouts have their place—but if you’re already dealing with cortisol spikes from disrupted sleep or chronic stress, punishing your body with excessive cardio may backfire.

What helps many women in perimenopause is a shift toward:

• Strength training (to support bone density and muscle mass)
• Gentle mobility work (like Pilates or yoga)
• Walking and low-impact cardio (especially outdoors)
• Restorative rest days

It’s about moving smarter, not harder. The goal isn’t to burn out—it’s to build a strong, resilient body that can carry you into your next phase of life.

5. Talk to Your Doctor (and Don’t Settle for Shrugging)

If you’re experiencing disruptive symptoms, you deserve medical support. Period.

That might include:

• Getting your thyroid checked (symptoms can overlap with perimenopause)
• Discussing hormonal labs, though remember: hormone levels fluctuate daily, so a single test isn’t the full picture
• Exploring non-hormonal or hormonal treatments like bioidentical hormone therapy, if appropriate

And if your provider dismisses your symptoms? Find a new one. Truly. You deserve care that takes your experience seriously.

What I Learned Watching My Mother Go Through It

My mom never used the word “perimenopause.” Back then, no one did. She just knew something was off—and that no one seemed to have answers. She struggled with sleep, had unpredictable mood swings, and at one point told me, “I don’t feel like myself.”

She powered through, like so many women do. But I remember how lonely it made her feel—like she was the only one going through it.

What I’ve learned since then is that it doesn’t have to be that way. We can talk about it. We can support each other. And we can enter this phase not with fear—but with wisdom.

The Emotional Side: Giving Yourself Grace

It’s not just physical. Perimenopause is deeply emotional. You may feel grief over the changes. You may also feel liberation—like something is shifting, softening, demanding you slow down and pay attention.

For me, this phase became an invitation to listen more closely to my needs. To reevaluate where I spend my time. To soften my self-talk. It was a wake-up call—and a gift.

If you feel moody, anxious, or like you’ve lost your edge, you’re not broken. Your hormones are fluctuating, yes—but so is your identity, your energy, your sense of what’s next.

This is a transition. It’s allowed to be messy. And also full of power.

Your Wellness Wins

• Track your full cycle experience—not just bleeding days. Spot patterns and give your body context.
• Add one hormone-supportive food to your routine. Think: flaxseeds, leafy greens, or fermented foods.
• Try resistance training twice a week. Support your bones, joints, and strength long-term.
• Upgrade your sleep environment tonight. Dim lights, cool your room, and skip screens before bed.
• Say no to one thing this week. Boundaries are hormonal self-care, too.

The Power of Understanding Your Changing Body

This isn’t just a phase. It’s a pivotal chapter in your health journey. And it’s not about bracing for decline—it’s about stepping into a deeper, wiser version of yourself with clarity, support, and compassion.

Perimenopause doesn’t mean losing who you are. It means becoming more of yourself—once you’ve peeled back the noise, the expectations, and the misinformation.

So support your hormones. Support your heart. Ask better questions. Make space for your needs.

You’re not falling apart—you’re recalibrating. And you’re allowed to make this transition on your terms.

Let’s normalize that.